Friday, March 28, 2014

the difference between you and drake


This is Drake.

He looks dope as fukkk tossing one dollar bills (has a lot of traction on the Canadian dollar right now, FYI) so casually as if he was about to toss wealth to a groom and bride at a wedding, or um, a stripper. He's a rapper, he's Jewish, he's a Canadian-Jewish rapper and most importantly, he's a millennial. Albeit, he has thousands of dollar bills and tons of Instagram followers and you can barely afford name brand body lotion. (That store brand is just as good.)

What if I told you that you can buy that rolex or that lifetime supply of quinoa.

I read in The Globe and Mail that the Ontario Lottery and Gaming Corporation (OLG), is on considerable decline like BlackBerry and are searching to lure millennials for a cradle-to-crave customer. Yes, my immigrant baby boomer parents are prime examples of the customers they have now, looking for an easy route out of labour through tickets spewing arbitrary numbers that could turn into cash (not literally, maybe).

Me, the millennial, unlike them, the baby boomers, have no fucking desire to go to a convenient store, carefully pick 6 numbers and pay $3-5. And I have to wait until like, 8 or 9 PM for them to draw the numbers or maybe the next day if the stakes are really high. Are you fucking kidding me? That could go into my RRSP or my TFSA where I'll have something palpable at the beginning of my retirement.

Anywho, couldn't you just do something mobile related? Done.

Millennials, such strange creatures.

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